Category Archives: DBA Humor

  1. SQL Crossword

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    August 3, 2015 by Kenneth Fisher

    I decided I’d have some fun today. So for your entertainment here is my first crossword puzzle. (Word and PDF …
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  2. #ArgenisWithoutBorders the Sequel


    July 22, 2015 by Kenneth Fisher

    Last year Kirsten Benzel(b/t) and Argenis Fernandez(b/t) did this amazing thing. They organized a campaign and raised over $13,000 for …
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  3. Microsoft buys the dictionary


    April 1, 2015 by Kenneth Fisher

    It seems that Microsoft has finally gotten tired of all the jokes about the word “performant” or using “ask” as …
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  4. Tales of a DBA fed up with NOLOCK. Part 1


    February 16, 2015 by Kenneth Fisher

    Nov 12, 2014 Dear Diary, They asked for help again. Every now and again everything slows down and they see …
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  5. ‘Twas 4:45 Friday


    December 16, 2014 by Kenneth Fisher

    ‘Twas 4:45 Friday, and all through the office not a creature was stirring, not even the bosses. The code was …
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  6. Argenis and the unicorn hoodie


    July 2, 2014 by Kenneth Fisher

    Early yesterday Kirsten Benzel(b/t) announced something very exciting, at least exciting to me. Argenis Fernandez(b/t) has agreed to wear a …
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  7. T-SQL Tuesday #54: Interviews!


    May 13, 2014 by Kenneth Fisher

    It’s T-SQL Tuesday again and this month our host is Boris Hristov (b/t). He has asked us to discuss Interviewing. …
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  8. Why is there a sysobjects when we already have sys.objects?

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    May 5, 2014 by Kenneth Fisher

    Once upon a time in a version of SQL far far away we had system tables that were easy to …
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  9. T-SQL Tuesday #53: Why so serious


    April 8, 2014 by Kenneth Fisher

    Why so serious? If you ask anyone who knows me they will tell you I’m not a terribly serious person. …
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  10. Microsoft announces that it will no longer support SQL Server and that SQL 2014 was an April Fools Joke!


    April 1, 2014 by Kenneth Fisher

    Microsoft has announced that SQL 2014 was in fact an elaborate April Fool’s joke and that Microsoft intends to move …
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